Maybe it’s part of the reason why I've favored falling in love hard and fast. There’s nothing like a whirlwind romance to make you see the beauty all around. The object of your affection also has that sweet infatuation – one that hangs on every word you say, looks for the depth in your soul, and speaks without words. I think this is why I've spent so many years pursuing these loves; because it temporarily gives me a connection with my true dream. But my own inhibitions and learned behaviors keep me from it.
My father could work magic with just a pen and a napkin. He used to create inked masterpieces on tiny scraps of paper. My mother could make me feel as if I was floating; all with her voice and a guitar. In my own life I attempted to copy that – by immersing myself in drama, music, poetry. I could never duplicate the feeling. It’s much easier to dream about pursuing your dreams that walking the narrow road.
And it’s so easy to make excuses.
I figure I’m not dead yet though. And as long as I stay open to change something amazing and fantastic is bound to happen someday right?
